AMANDA
BOSSI

Who the hell is this girl? Why on God's earth should I listen to her or even read past this sentence? Well... let me tell you.

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Hey! I am Amanda Bossi. I am a thirty-something year old salon owner, "unconventional" mom, aspiring life and beauty industry business coach, and empowered woman trying to empower other women (and men). I have also already experienced more in my life than any one person should for my age. Obviously, I am a normal human being, just like you, who has had (and still has) some pent-up issues from past trauma and childhood bologna. I struggle with control issues, self-sabotaging, micromanaging my business and household, and not being able to calm the fuck down. I overthink. I constantly need to be doing something with my hands. I rage clean and organize out of pure anxiety. I hide from my family in parking lots and watch TikTok. I tell myself stories that serve me no good. I have had people hurt me, help me, use me, and everything in between. Sound familiar?

 

I am also a person working on her damn self-daily. Thankfully, a decade of therapy and reading practically every self-help book known to man have given me some tools in my toolbox to help me through facing those issues head on. I have had several years of business and leadership coaching and mentorship. I am in the process of receiving my Life Coach Certification. I have learned to be mindful of the habits and tendencies to kick their ass first before they kick mine. I surround myself with people and things that promote self-growth and engage in more hobbies and tasks that better serve me and bring me joy. I try to find peace and practice self-care when I can. I have learned (not mastered) the art of vulnerability and have found better forms of communication with those around me. I show myself grace. And, I have ferociously loved and have been loved. I am loved now and I sure as shit, love my damn self-more than I ever have. 

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I had a relatively normal childhood as the oldest of three girls and my parents are still together. I never wanted for anything. However, the urge for independence and being too big for my britches sent me out on my own at the tender age of eighteen. Of course, there was (and still is) chaos in my family as not one family is perfect. No one has lived that "Pleasantville" life. I have worked hard for everything in my life and my ego never allowed me to accept help or to feel any sense of entitlement. Help was being dished out all around me like the feast at Thanksgiving dinner. Be it as it may, I never felt like I should accept any help had it ever been offered to me. Would it have created scarcity for the other? Or perhaps my issues too stem from the perpetual feeling of “not enough.” I was never fucked up enough to receive it. I never did enough or was successful enough to receive praise. Who the fuck knows? These are just some of the issues I am working on every day,

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I was never a troublemaker and hated (or had the fear of) confrontation.  That did not stop me from dating sketchy characters or making some life decisions that were less than ideal. I made attempts to change, control, and perfect people around me while trying to be someone I was not. And, oh man- did I try to live up to society’s expectations of me. I did not know myself or love myself.

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I became a widow at 30. Yeah... threw that dark little nugget of a detail at you. My husband was an alcoholic undenounced to me. Listen, no one can ever prepare you for that. I learned a shit ton about what alcohol could do to a person’s brain and body. I had to adapt to becoming a caretaker and knowing that my idea of a fairytale life was dead. Dealing with the grief is just a small part of death. When you oversee the dealing of all the financial aftermath of death on top of grief, it is truly a trying time. Not only that, but I also had to grieve what I envisioned my life to be. No one teaches you that shit.

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Did I mention I opened a salon during that time too? Like, holy shit! That was an insane part of my life. I had to manage being a solopreneur, paying two mortgages and sets of household bills, and grieve. What the fuck?

 

And, oh snap. I also met a man with two kids and became a mom to them just shortly after, too. Oh, and I hired employees. Yeah. I am qualified to be writing here. 

 

Becoming an “unconditional” mom, has its new set of challenges. Let me explain my terminology of “unconventional.” My children’s bio-mom left when my youngest was two. This means I am not a bonus mom, nor stepmom, and they did not come from my body. Society has not given me a name or term to go by. Technically, I am also not their legal guardian and have not adopted them. So… I call myself an “unconventional” mom. I could also use that term for my parenting skills and the way we choose to parent our kids. We are not helicopter parents, give our kids tasks to do on their own, and instill a grand sense of independence. We have elevated expectations, hold them to strict standards socially and educationally, and highly promote being self-starters. We give the freedom to make their own choices but teach them advance life lessons. We have taken the high road on parenting. Their iPads are a reward not the babysitters. We have “real” conversations. We push them outside their comfort zones. We make them cry. (Do not worry. We love them. They surely know that.)

 

I manage my business very similarly. My salon has grown faster than I could ever imagine. If you would have asked me when I opened if I thought Live Salon would be any more than me just “getting by,” I would have laughed at you. Good God. I cried every day opening my salon in fear of all the what ifs. But here I am. We are one of the most sought-after salons in my area and have grown exponentially. My little salon is now a half a million-dollar salon. It is because I have learned how to lead and mentor my staff to reach their pee-in-the-pants goals, not just those set by the salon’s financial needs. I am not afraid to let them manage themselves and for me to high five them or redirect them to better habits. I individualize and help them create their own unique plans. Our culture is rock solid, and I do not let that hinder. We remain fluid and constantly strive for more. We have created family and community. We are a team atmosphere. I am so enormously proud of where we are today.

 

My life has not been easy and, more than likely, never will be. Honestly, whose is? However, everything is a matter of perception. You may read this and think, "Damn. I have experienced nothing like this. My life problems seem insignificant compared to hers." Or maybe you are thinking, "Shut up, bitch. I have experienced this, that, and that. You have nothing on me." It is a matter of perspective. See, the worst thing I have ever experienced and the worst thing you have ever experienced is still the worst. The most amazing thing you have experienced and the most amazing thing I have experienced is still the most amazing. Get it?

 

​The thing is, I am no longer telling myself the story that I am not enough or do enough or feel enough. My story now is that I am enough. All that I do and continue to do is a major bonus to my life. I have rewritten my story to show my resiliency and perseverance. I love myself and people love me. When I feel down about myself, I show myself grace. I give myself room to make mistakes and learn from them. I tell myself that people’s opinions of me have nothing to do with me and everything to do with them. I can dodge the balls thrown at my face and if I do not, I know where the ice pack is. I buckle up and throw my hands up on this ride called life.

 

I manifest this shit. I am amplifying my story but telling it to you. I want your story you tell yourself to match your desires. As an aspiring life coach and business consultant, I want you to know there is someone here for you who is relatable, real, and who will make you answer more in-depth questions about your own life, business, or relationships. I want to help you view life with new lenses. And honestly, I want to learn more. I want to grow more. I am never done traveling my journey of self-growth, self-love, and empowerment of myself and others. Join me.

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"The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love

and be loved in return." -Moulin Rouge